How it works

How to use Make Friends & Fire

From finding an activity to receiving responses: this guide explains the main features of the app and how they work together.

10 practical scenarios

Ways to use Make Friends & Fire

Choose the situation closest to what you want to do right now. Each route is an example, not a required social script.

Scenario 1

Invite one person personally

You know who you want to see and want to send a clear, warm invitation.

  1. 1Open Create Invite.
  2. 2Choose one or more activities you would genuinely like to do together.
  3. 3Choose a mood and then the invitation format.
  4. 4Optionally add a time and location.
  5. 5Generate the invitation, edit the wording if you want, then share it as text, a link or an E-card.
Scenario 2

Let a group choose

You want to invite several people without deciding every detail yourself.

  1. 1Create an invitation with several activities.
  2. 2Choose Group as the sharing mode when you save and share the invitation.
  3. 3Send the same link to the people you want to invite.
  4. 4Everyone responds separately to activities, time, location or with a message.
  5. 5Review the responses in your profile and decide together what to do.
Scenario 3

Join Me: your plan is already set

You are doing something anyway and want other people to be able to join easily.

  1. 1Choose the activity or program you already intend to do.
  2. 2Create the invitation and choose Join Me.
  3. 3Make the practical details as concrete as possible.
  4. 4Share the Join Me link; people can join with a name or anonymously.
  5. 5As organizer you can see the total and the names people chose to leave.
Scenario 4

Choose a menu or a full program

You are deciding whether the recipient should choose or whether all activities form one plan.

  1. 1Select several activities in the Invite Maker.
  2. 2Use a Menu when the recipient may choose one or several favorites.
  3. 3Use Detailed Menu when you also want fuller descriptions for those choices.
  4. 4Choose Full Program when every selected activity is part of the same sequence.
  5. 5Check the generated wording before sharing so it is clear what is optional and what is fixed.
Scenario 5

Add your own activity

What you want to suggest is not in the public catalog.

  1. 1Sign in and open Create Invite.
  2. 2Choose Own activity and add a name and optional description.
  3. 3It appears in your Own category and can immediately be used in invitations.
  4. 4Manage it later through Profile → My activities.
  5. 5If you want others to use it too, nominate it for admin review.
Scenario 6

Use Guide Me when you do not know where to start

You want connection, but choosing from hundreds of ideas feels like too much.

  1. 1Open I’m not sure.
  2. 2Choose Guide Me.
  3. 3Indicate what feels comfortable, doable or fitting right now.
  4. 4Review the ranked suggestions and choose a starting point that feels good enough.
  5. 5Continue to the Invite Maker and change anything you want.
Scenario 7

Use Mixer and Wheel for inspiration

You want to be surprised or quickly see combinations without browsing for a long time.

  1. 1Open I’m not sure.
  2. 2Use Wheel when you want the app to pick a category and then an activity.
  3. 3Use Mixer when you want to combine three activities at a time.
  4. 4Lock the Mixer ideas you like and remix the others.
  5. 5Take the idea or combination you like into the Invite Maker.
Scenario 8

Choose and personalize an E-card

You want the invitation to feel visual and intentional, not only clear.

  1. 1Generate your invitation first.
  2. 2Open the E-card view.
  3. 3Compare the card styles and choose the one that fits the invitation.
  4. 4Optionally add your own photo and check the crop.
  5. 5Download the card or use it alongside the shareable invitation link.
Scenario 9

Share an invitation and receive responses

Your invitation is ready and you want to send it through whatever channel is easiest for you.

  1. 1Save the invitation if you want an interactive share link and responses.
  2. 2Choose Share, WhatsApp, Email or Copy link.
  3. 3You can also copy only the invitation text into Signal, SMS or another app.
  4. 4The recipient can respond through the link without creating an account.
  5. 5When you are signed in, new responses appear later in your profile.
Scenario 10

Start without an account - sign in later

You first want to see whether Make Friends & Fire is useful for you.

  1. 1Start directly from Home; the main discovery and invitation tools do not require an account.
  2. 2Try an invitation or use Guide Me, Mixer, Wheel or Fire Starter first.
  3. 3Sign in only when you want to save or reuse things.
  4. 4An account lets you keep invitations, responses, people, own activities and favorite conversation starters.
  5. 5You can then reuse earlier invitations instead of starting from scratch.
1 · Start where you are

You do not have to know exactly what you want to do yet

You can go straight to an invitation when you already have an idea, or first get help choosing. Make Friends & Fire is designed to turn both a clear plan and a vague ‘we should do something sometime’ into a next step.

Go straight to Create an invitation when you already know what you want to suggest.
Use I’m not sure when you want inspiration, structure or a random choice.
The main tools work without an account.
Explore Help me choose
2 · Choose activities

Browse categories and hundreds of things to do

The activity catalog is divided into recognizable categories. Every category has its own color and icon, and every activity has its own consistent shade within that category, making different kinds of ideas easier to recognize and combine.

Open a category and select one or more activities.
Combine activities from different categories in the same invitation.
Use the subtle search icon when you already have an idea of what you are looking for.
With an account you can save your own activities; the Own category only appears after you add one.
You can nominate an own activity for the public catalog. It is always reviewed by an admin first.
Open the Invite maker
3 · When choosing is difficult

Guide me, Wheel, Mixer and Surprise me

In I’m not sure you can first indicate what feels comfortable or doable right now, then use different discovery modes instead of inventing an idea from scratch.

Guide me ranks fitting ways to start based on your preferences.
Spin the Wheel first chooses a category and then an activity.
Activity Mixer mixes three activities at once and lets you lock the ones you like.
Surprise me picks three activities and can turn them directly into an invitation.
Try the discovery tools
4 · Make it personal

Turn separate ideas into one personal invitation

After choosing activities you can shape the invitation further. Pick a mood and format, add practical details and let Make Friends & Fire bring the information together into text you can still change yourself.

Choose a mood or tone that fits the situation.
Choose an invitation format, including the richer Detailed Menu.
Optionally add a time and location.
Edit the generated text yourself or rewrite it in another tone.
Create an invitation
5 · Share it

Send text, a link or a visual E-card

An invitation does not have to be sent in one fixed format. Copy the text, create a visual E-card or use an interactive share link where the other person can respond immediately.

Copy invitation text into WhatsApp, Signal, SMS or another app.
Create an E-card in different visual styles and optionally add your own photo.
Use Share, WhatsApp, Email or Copy link for a saved invitation.
6 · Responding

The other person can choose instead of only saying yes or no

A shared invitation has its own response page. The recipient can say how the invitation feels and respond much more specifically to the options you sent.

Choose Sounds good, Maybe / adjust something or I have another idea.
Select one or more activities from the invitation.
Optionally leave a message.
Optionally suggest a time or location.
Recipients do not need an account to respond.
7 · Group & Join Me

Let a group choose, or invite anyone to come along

Besides a personal invitation there are two ways to invite several people. Group lets everyone respond to the options separately. Join Me is for a plan you already intend to do, where people can simply say they are coming along.

Group: several people respond separately and can discuss activities, time or location.
Join Me: you set the plan; anyone with the link can say they are joining.
A Join Me participant can add a name or join anonymously, without an account.
The organizer sees the Join Me participants and total; names are not exposed as a public participant list.
A participant can later withdraw their RSVP when edits are allowed.
8 · Share-link privacy

Anyone with the link, or private with an access code

You decide how accessible a shared invitation should be. Ordinary share pages are not meant to be publicly indexed, and an access code can add another privacy layer.

Anyone with the link: easiest sharing without accounts or an extra step.
Private with access code: the invitation stays hidden until the right code is entered.
The access code is not automatically included when sharing the link.
You can close responses, allow or disable editing and set an expiry date.
9 · Conversation starters

Start with words when an activity is not what you need

Fire Starter offers conversation prompts that you can browse, copy and - with an account - save for later.

Browse different conversation topics and prompts.
Save favorite starters in your profile.
Copy a starter into your own conversation.
Open Fire Starter
10 · With an account

Save invitations, responses, people and favorites

An account is not required for the core experience, but it adds a personal workspace where you can return to things you made before and invite someone again more easily.

Profile opens with an overview of what needs attention and useful next actions.
Invitations brings saved invitations, sharing and responses together.
People stores people and relevant preferences.
Saved combines your own activities and favorite conversation starters.
Reuse an earlier invitation with different activities, details or tone.
11 · People

Remember what fits someone without starting over every time

People lets you save people you invite more often. Store context and preferences so the Invite maker can surface relevant activity suggestions later.

Save a name and context label.
Store preferences you want to remember for future invitations.
Choose someone in the Invite maker and see fitting suggestions.
12 · The idea behind it

Clearer invitations and real choices

Make Friends & Fire grew out of ten years of experiments through 2Tango, Together and ietsdoen.nu. The central idea stayed the same: say what you would genuinely like to do together, give the other person real choices, and make the move from intention to connection more concrete.

Useful for dating, friendship and other ways of spending time together.
Designed with neurodivergent experiences in mind without prescribing one social style for everyone.
The people involved always decide what feels right and what happens next.
Read the history

Practical guides for real situations

If you know the feature but not what to say or suggest, the guides focus on concrete situations: low-pressure dates, new friendships, low-energy plans, clearer invitations and things to do together.

Make Friends & Fire

You do not have to use everything

Sometimes one activity and one message are enough. At other times, several options, a group link or a detailed E-card are useful. Use only the parts that make the situation clearer or easier for you.